Trans people and VG: everywhere and nowhere at the same time
Article published May 22, 2024 as part of the Diversity and inclusivity newsletter
If we’ve gathered here today, it’s first and foremost because we share a certain fascination for video games. And if we love them so much, it’s for a whole host of reasons that depend on the sensibilities of each and every one of us. But I have to admit that being able to regularly shape and embody an avatar as you please is a rare pleasure that few media allow. As a cis woman, I don’t shy away when I’m allowed to create badass female characters, or ones that simply don’t fit into the usual mould. Sometimes, I also like to find myself in the avatars I control. When I was a young teenager, I used to opt for models, more or less, of the woman I aspired to be. If I tell you my experience quickly, it’s mainly to put forward a fact: there may be a link between identity, identification and video games. And this link is all the stronger when that identity is trans.
The character creation tool, a real relief for some
When you’re born in the wrong body, when you gradually realize that the gender you’ve been assigned doesn’t suit you, having spaces to express it and let your true identity blossom without pressure can be a vital need. So aren’t video games the perfect escape? Granted, this impression I have doesn’t worth much. But you don’t have to scratch very far to get more than a modest impression.
“I began working with a transgender client. One day I asked my client how they coped day-to-day in the face of overwhelming rejections from family and peers, and they replied, ‘you know, I think gaming’s saved my life’. From there they educated me on how they used avatars to explore, develop, and consolidate their gender identity.“
From this individual experience, Helen Morgan and other researchers have drawn a whole study: The Role of the Avatar in Gaming for Trans and Gender Diverse Young People. Even those who don’t speak the language of Shakespeare will have understood the idea: to analyze the therapeutic importance of avatars and the system for creating them for transgender or non-binary people. While some of the people concerned noted a feeling of exclusion linked to too much binarity in character creation (which is fortunately tending to disappear today), it was above all a certain relief that emerged from the working groups organized for the study. The relief of being able to shape an avatar more easily than their own body, to experiment, to try to slip into the skin of the coveted genre, to feel a little more themselves. “I think creating an avatar is a really good way of consolidating your self-image… I also think avatars are great ways of trying out who you want to be, because a lot of (transgender) people don’t have a clear vision of themselves at first…” explains a 22-year-old participant. Intellectual honesty aside, it has to be said that the study doesn’t really go into much detail, doesn’t ultimately explain much and focuses on a small sample of 17 people. And that’s a shame, because there’s a lot to say on the subject.
Margaret Evans is one of the people who testified about their experience in the media.
It’s easy enough to find the information you need when you’ve got a mere Internet box. Forums, articles, podcasts… If you surf the net, you’ll find a plethora of testimonials from trans people putting into words the very special relationship they have with video games. And if the medium is a prime outlet for people in search of themselves, it’s not surprising that it’s particularly attractive to them. It’s only a short step from there to the conclusion that a large percentage of trans people play a lot. A step taken without batting an eyelid by content creator and developer Ache in the Game Dolls Advance podcast. “Trans chicks are kind of ubiquitous in video games,” she blurts out during the introduction to a discussion about the links between trans women and video games. And after all, if it’s a concerned person who says it, it’s hard to contradict her, isn’t it?
Unfortunately, it’s impossible to confirm this with figures. And for good reason: trans people are more often than not absent from the statistics compiled by gamers and industry stakeholders alike. Statista, SELL, SNJV… All fall into the trap of an excluding binary representation… Trans people are thus “ubiquitous” and nowhere at the same time. And this invisibilization is clearly felt across all strata of the industry…
“The experience I have of my gender is extremely linked to games. I’d had one or two bouts of dysphoria at the end of my bachelor’s degree and the beginning of my master’s degree. And then I played Acceptance, a game made for JamForLeelah. When I finished playing it, I said to myself ‘Ok, now I’ve got to stop kidding myself and explore my gender once and for all“
While there has been a slight improvement over the past few years in terms of representation in games (Tell me Why, Apex Legends, Celeste…), the trans people who make up the industry are constantly invisible. All too little is said about the many trans women developers who not only have excellent games to their credit – including one nominated for a Pegasus award, please – but who are also the pride of an entire videogame scene: queer games. It’s probably one of the most misunderstood and darkest movements for the general public. It’s impossible to pitch the game to any mainstream site and expect even the tiniest media coverage. The movement’s philosophy that video games can be made by and for everyone results in short, abstract adventures, with no great means, no great AD… In short, games that are hard to sell in today’s video game world.
Dys4ia is of the most famous queer games
And that’s a shame, because this scene has given life to new ways of thinking about video games, proposing often strong stories blending narrative and gameplay to best render “the effects of the stigma associated with a marginalized identity on a person’s life.” These range from Anna Anthropy, who takes us through hormone therapy with Dys4ia (2012), to the small group that composed Acceptance at the JamforLeelah game jam to show the beginnings of gender transition, to games like Gender Quest and Super Queeros (Audre) that give another vision of the relationship to gender and LGBTQIA+ communities. But while some people take a close interest in these productions, which sometimes inspire some big productions (Life is Strange…), like Bonnie Ruberg who has written extensively on the subject, they remain excluded from the mainstream industry, even more so in France. For developer Audre, interviewed by Game Her, the movement “isn’t really part of the collective imagination of the French videogame world.” Once again: everywhere and nowhere at the same time.
What’s interesting about this scene is that it’s also very representative of the condition of trans people in the industry. As we’ve said, the goal is to make a game out of anything. And trans people often have fewer means than others. At least, that’s the conclusion of Margaux Cosne’s quantitative study “exploring health, access to care and discrimination experienced by transgender people in France in 2021” (all industries included). Whether at school, at work or in everyday life, being trans is often more complicated than being cis. While this may seem obvious, it’s hard to visualize precisely all the forms these obstacles can take. Dropping out of school, losing a job after coming out, housing discrimination, poor housing… The result: “transgender people are more often in precarious financial, employment and housing situations than the general population”, says the study. This finding also applies to health. The situation of trans people is often the “meeting point of different stigmas” (homophobia, transphobia, psychophobia…). Inevitably, this can have an impact on well-being and mental health. Add to this the fact that trans people may have specific difficulties in accessing care, particularly in finding a health professional familiar with trans-identity issues, and this is how we end up with shock headlines like “for transgender people, the risk of attempting suicide is almost eight times greater.” Mental health that plays on and, at the same time, can be a consequence of precariousness… In short, we faces a vicious circle that deprives a large proportion of trans people of the important jobs and financial resources needed to develop a great game. Hence the need to create creative spaces designed for and by marginalized people, to prevent them from becoming invisible.
Some bundles feature queer games, like this one on Steam
To live happily as a trans, let’s live hidden
That said, it’s important to remember that invisibilization can sometimes be a choice, more or less deliberate. In the world of work, “80% of transgender and non-binary people are invisible in the workplace”, explains têtu. This choice is not always a choice, of course, as it’s also important to remember that if some people hide, it’s obviously to avoid remarks and other transphobic discrimination. In the world of video games, this is also, if not more, the case. For some, the adage “to live happily, let’s live hidden” is almost a question of survival.
Just look at the reactions when an esport team announces a trans player in its female roster. On social media, it quickly becomes a jungle, and it’s best to have a strong backbone to withstand the insults and transphobic remarks, when the announcement doesn’t generate a huge wave of harassment for the player in question. Cosmopolitan spoke to Lilith about her own experience:
“I made a thread on X recently to denounce something that was really close to my heart and that I’ve read several times. It’s people saying that I started competitive as a boy and because I couldn’t achieve much as a boy, I had to become a girl in order to perform. I started out in the competitive world after transitioning {…} Transitioning means exposing yourself to a lot of danger and violence. Part of my family no longer speaks to me and doesn’t recognize my transition. Some of my old friends won’t talk to me because I’ve made a transition and they weren’t able to understand it, and sometimes in quite violent ways. I’m bound to have difficulties in my life, whether it’s dealing with administrative formalities, finding accommodation or getting a job. I’ve already been physically attacked in my life. It’s not easy, it’s not obvious and it’s not “for performance”. The game isn’t worth the candle, as they say.”
More recently, we’ve also seen videos tinged with crass transphobia attacking the columnists of the Game Dolls Advance podcast for simply expressing their opinion on everything surrounding the game Stellar Blade. In addition to megering and insults, the harassment campaign also revealed private information and content. As you’ll have gathered, depending on the subject, it can be anything from a repressive little dude to a progressive chick on the surface. This constant suspicion, these omnipresent attacks, they can make you want to hide to avoid receiving an additional wave of hatred. In fact, speaking of the invisibilization of the queer games scene, Audre herself said that this might not be such a bad thing: “The last time I was harassed online, it was limited to two anonymous messages on Tumblr. Reaching a wider audience would also involve more risk.” Unfortunately, it still takes extra courage and energy to come to terms with your transidentity in today’s world. Courage all the more important as “attacks” can come from all sides.
The game Celeste has a trans protagonist (and developper)
Listen to help better
Mistakes and shortcomings are unfortunately plenty, especially among uninformed allies. Yes, it’s no use crying out “I’ve played Celeste too!” every time you come across a trans gamer, as the columnists in the Game Dolls Advance podcast gently mock. Just as it’s important to consider the different lives and experiences of gamers, it’s also important to remember that there’s no one and only way of living as a trans person.
But more than a few blunders, this invisibilization is sometimes caused by the very people who present themselves as allies. Even with the best of intentions, trans people are often the last to be consulted and the first to be marginalized. A recent example was Furax, a charity event that did a lot of good work in terms of representation, but missed the boat on the transfem issue.
Message published on X by the FURAX association following the reproaches made against it
But the most disturbing example, in my opinion, is probably the turmoil surrounding the Hogwarts Legacy game. We heard a lot from allies calling for a boycott because of JK Rowling’s transphobic comments and actions, but we heard a little less from trans people. We thus found ourselves in a lunar situation where everyone spoke for these people without taking the time to listen to them. In fact, the few trans people who spoke out on the subject in France called for a more moderate reaction, in a sense. Between internal moral dilemmas, clear-sightedness about the futility of such a boycott and fear of harassment, some of them contributed some very interesting reflections on the subject, of which there are few traces today. It has to be said that the backlash has been colossal for trans people, so it’s easy to understand the desire not to want to be constantly brought back to this subject. Especially when our word has been almost totally ignored by the very people who claimed to defend it. Once again: everywhere and nowhere at the same time.
And now you may be thinking, “but isn’t that exactly what she’s doing with this article: speaking in the place of?” And it is. In a context of particularly strong and frequent attacks on trans people and their rights, it seemed important to me to revisit the issue. But if you really want to know more about the situation of trans people, I can only encourage you to listen to and read the first people concerned. Of course, there are social networks and Twitch/Youtube channels, but that’s not all. Given the lack of a place of expression for this section of society, some have taken up arms to forge their own medium.
It was the thought “why in almost all the initiatives between chicks in video games there are hardly any trans chicks” that prompted Ache, Lenophie and the others to give life to Game Dolls Advance, a podcast featuring only transfem people. While the first episode focused on the link between trans-identity and video games, the idea was not to make this the main topic of the podcast, but rather to give a space to those who have too little of it to share their “more or less disastrous” opinions on games and the industry. In other words, to make people more visible without reducing them to their gender identity.
Miniature of one of the Game Dolls Advance podcast segment
Because yes, making things more visible means above all normalizing presence and speech. So let’s normalize together. Let those who want to assert their transidentity do so. Let those who want to define themselves as gamer above all do so. And above all, let’s leave room for the expression of the experiences, works and opinions of all these people, whether they’re programmers, gamers, developers, voice actors, designers, streamers, concept artists… It’s up to us to act to stop the crushing and oppressive mechanism of invisibilization once and for all.
